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  • Writer's pictureMelanie Albin PsyS. LMFT

What To Teach Our Children and Our Grandchildren to Create Peace in the World

Updated: Sep 12, 2023

I haven't written a blog for a long time because of personal and societal despair. When I was younger, I thought my generation was going to change the world. I thought the world would be at peace and hunger and homelessness would be a thing of the past. Realizing this isn't going to happen in my lifetime, what can my generation do? We can still teach our children and our grandchildren that each of them has special gifts, strengths, and talents that are intended to make the world a better place. They can then work with others who have special gifts, strengths, and talents that are equally intended to make the world a better place.

The fundamental most important knowledge to pass on is that we are all here to learn from each other and that we have to work together, all people, all races, all religions, and all countries to achieve a peaceful and harmonious planet. We all have unique gifts, strengths, and talents to contribute to making the world a better place.

Our failure is not recognizing our differences as being part of the tapestry of the universe. The Europeans who sailed to America, rather than respecting and learning from indigenous people that were there first, fought and killed Native Americans stole their land, and forced them into poverty. The English captured and tore African Americans from their families and their native country and sold them into slavery. Our culture has encouraged and allowed the mistreatment of any race that is different. Imagine if Europeans had shared space with Native Americans and learned from their knowledge of the healing properties of plants, and their understanding and respect of the earth and animals' resources and the balance of nature. We would have lived in a much more evolved America.

In researching my ancestry, I discovered my fourth great-grandfather was a slave owner who bred horses and my fourth great-grandmother was a slave. I researched their history to discover as much as I could about their story. My great-grandmother took care of his sick wife and then moved in with him and they had 5 children together. The first of these children, just after they were all freed by my grandfather, was drafted into the service where he became a POW. He was rescued after a year and eventually inherited and lived on his father's farm.

We all likely had similar ancestors. Every African American in another country but Africa had an ancestor who was taken from their family and enslaved. We owe a lifetime debt of discounts on homes and free education to these Native American Descendants. This injustice needs to be taught in all elementary schools, so we don't continue this injustice or continue making the mistake of doing it to any race and people who although different then us, have their special gifts, strengths, and talents that we need to work with if we ever intend to make the world a better place.

400 years ago white people brought black people over here and enslaved them. And sold them. And treated them as less than human. For 250 years. While white men formed the country and created its laws and its systems of government. While 10-15 generations of white families got to grow and flourish and make choices that could make their lives better.

And then 150 years ago white people "freed" black people from slavery. But then angry white people created laws that made it impossible for them to vote. Or to own land. Or to have the same rights as white people. And even erected monuments glorifying people who actively had fought to keep them enslaved. All while another 5, 10 generations of white families got to grow and accumulate wealth and gain land and get an education.

And then 60 years ago we made it "legal" for black people to vote, and to be "free" from discrimination. But angry white people still fought to keep schools segregated. And closed off neighborhoods to white people only. And made it harder for black people to get bank loans, get quality education or health care, or (gasp) marry a white person. All while another 2-3 generations of white families got to grow and pass their wealth down to their children and their children's children.

And then we entered an age where we had the technology to make PUBLIC the things that were already happening in private-- the beatings, the stop and frisk laws, the unequal distribution of justice, the police brutality (police began in America as slave patrols designed to catch runaway slaves). Only now, after 400+ years and 20+ generations of a white head start, are we STARTING to truly have a dialog about what it means to be black.

White privilege doesn't mean you haven't suffered or fought or worked hard. It doesn't mean white people are responsible for the sins of their ancestors. It doesn’t mean you can’t be proud of who you are.

It DOES mean that we need to acknowledge that the system our ancestors created is built FOR white people.

It DOES mean that we aren't disadvantaged because of the color of our skin and it DOES mean that we owe it to our neighbors-- of all colors-- to acknowledge that and work to make our world more equitable

The older countries in Asia and Europe have more knowledge and demonstrate how to recycle for example and how to use wind for transportation, another example that we could all benefit from, that would save resources. It will take working together to disseminate information everywhere to make this knowledge as well as a host of other knowledge resources available everywhere.

Educating our youth and children and grandchildren is necessary to help them reach their full potential and to make them aware of what the earth is facing. Going to school is free in Austria. Educating our youth should be free everywhere. We need to educate our youth about the world's problems, where our garbage goes, that hunger and homelessness exist everywhere, and the cost and lack of resources, food, water, electricity, gas, and oil to name a few. We need to teach our youth about global warming and cutting down trees and the effects on the environment and animals. Hunger and homelessness should be the top priority.

We must talk to our youth and grandchildren about these problems that they are inheriting. We need to advocate addressing all these issues in our school lesson plans.

How Our Body Works

We must also teach our children what we know about how the body works, how to cope with stress, balance activities of exercise, and how exercise works to use up excess adrenaline (see stress management blog). And how to turn off adrenaline by relaxing using progressive relaxation techniques and imagery and why and how this works (see relaxation blog).

We need to know how self-esteem is created and give our children and grandchildren the best chance of knowing what their gifts, strengths, and talents are. High self-esteem will equip them to develop their gifts, strengths, and talents so they will know what their role will be to change the world. We can help create a positive self-image in our children and our grandchildren. Our self-esteem is influenced by what we hear in our environment about ourselves from parents, grandparents, siblings, peers, and teachers. It's not the accuracy of what we hear, it's the number of times we hear it.

The most important trait for our children's success is high self-esteem. They need to know what they are good at and what their strengths are because that is what will help them find their way to making the world a better place with their particular gifts, strengths, and talents. Once they hear something 21 times, it's recorded in their unconscious mind and becomes what they think of themselves.

Our unconscious or subconscious mind is like the hard drive of a computer. It stores all of our information. Our conscious mind is what is currently aware. Our thoughts are in part, directed to our conscious mind from our subconscious mind. The thoughts in our unconscious mind are thoughts we accidentally reinforce by thinking about them in our conscious mind or the part of our mind where we are aware.

Our brain thinks that whatever we are thinking, is happening now. "What if" or worry thoughts, which are about something bad happening in the future, trigger adrenaline in our body because our brain thinks it is happening now. Our body's only way of helping us is to trigger adrenaline which starts a stress cycle. The stress cycle begins when adrenaline prepares us to fight or flee.

When we consciously worry about something, our brain counts the number of times we think about it and notes the environment we think it in, for example, the car when we are driving or before we fall asleep. If we think or hear the same thought, in any environment, 21 times in a row, our unconscious mind records it. Our unconscious brain is hard-wired to record the thoughts we think about, assuming the thoughts are important to our survival. Our brain doesn't discern whether the thought is true or not, only the number of times we think about it, or hear it before it's recorded. The unconscious mind will then throw the thought out, in the same environment, to our conscious mind.

Then if we reinforce it again by thinking about it, our unconscious mind thinks it did the right thing by throwing it out, and it looks for more opportunities to throw the thought out, in different environments when our mind is free. Now our "what if "or negative thought becomes a habit. So how do you change worrying thoughts and the habit of worrying or recording negative self-talk which turns into negative self-esteem?

For us to feel in balance, the goal is to keep the stress cycle off. If your worry thought is not a problem to be solved or a negative thought then it is a thought to be stopped or changed to a positive one and a thought that doesn't trigger adrenaline. If you are thinking about a problem that needs to be solved, see my blog for problem-solving skills to keep your adrenaline to a minimum.

To change a worry thought or negative thought you have first to become aware of it as soon as your unconscious mind throws out the unwanted thought. It takes practice to catch your thought just when it begins. Listen for any "what if" or negative thoughts.

  1. When you recognize the thought, visualize or imagine something that signifies stop to you. This is "thought-stopping". For example, you could see a stop sign, use an eraser, paint over it, or imagine the thought going up and away in a balloon.

  2. If it is a worry thought that triggers adrenaline replace it with "I am calm and relaxed". Once you think or say out loud "I'm calm and relaxed "your body will turn off your adrenaline and you will feel relaxed.

The thoughts you want to consciously choose to think or say out loud to your children and grandchildren, you don't want to trigger adrenaline. Our thoughts and words need to be positive because our brain does not understand the word not. So, if you were to say, "I am not anxious", your brain would hear "I am anxious".

After you think or say "I am calm and relaxed" how much your body relaxes, depends on what the word "relax" means to you or them. In other words, how much you have previously trained your body to relax. You can train your body to relax by using progressive relaxation which is deep breathing and telling each part of your body to relax from head to toe, or visualization; where you imagine you are in a relaxing place, or use a combination of these. You can imagine a light beginning at the top of your head and relaxing you as it moves through your body, or by doing yoga stretching breathing, or guided imagery.

We must teach our grandchildren how to turn off adrenaline and return our bodies to a balanced state of equilibrium. Imagine you are in a relaxing place. When you do, your body thinks you are in that place. And it relaxes as if you are in that place. #usingimagination2relax #how2relax

When you rush, and you think or say out loud, I've got to hurry, your body sends a surge of adrenaline to you so you can run there. Only, you are not running, so you don't need that burst of adrenaline. So now you feel irritable or anxious. Our body's only way of helping us is to trigger adrenaline. Our body responds to our thinking as if it is literal and it's happening now. The goal is to keep your and your grandchildren's adrenaline off. You do not need your adrenaline unless you are in a life-threatening situation.

Another side effect of adrenaline is that it impairs your thinking. Because it has to be taken from somewhere, the brain donates its thinking to give you more energy to physically get you there.

You don't have to wait until you have a moment by yourself, take a moment in your car when you are stuck in traffic or standing in line at the grocery. Take some relaxing breaths. Breathe in deep from your abdomen, out through your mouth. Breathe in good energy, and breathe out stress. Tell your body to relax. The more you do it, the more you will benefit from it. If you are in the car with your kids, have them do it too! If you are a teacher, do it with your classroom. Children are great at imagining so teach them early how to use their imagination

to relax.

Universal Laws

We need to teach our grandchildren and our youth about universal laws. Every aspect of our lives is governed by Universal Laws. Not only "The Law of Attraction" but "The Law of Cause and Effect" "The Power of Expectancy" "The Law of Belief" "The Law of Love" "The Law of Guidance" and "The Law of Balance" (Bringing balance to your life.) and "The Law of Multiplicity". The Law of Multiplicity is the effect of your actions multiplied. If your intention, thought or action is kind to yourself and others, for example, that kindness comes back to you multiplied. A lesser known and lesser understood law is the "Law of Manifestation" Your thoughts if held onto long enough, create your reality. If you want something and you hold onto wanting it, the universe cannot bring it to you because you are focused on the wanting of it which is the absence of it. Believing it so strongly that you already have it and being grateful for it, if it's in your highest good, the universe will manifest it for you. I explain how Mastery of Your Thoughts and this law works with your highest good in my book "Total Wellness" and "How To Live A Peaceful and Harmonious Life". I recommend reading "Your Life Why It Is the Way It Is and What You Can Do About It" and "Understanding the Universal Laws" by Bruce McArthur. It's the easiest-to-understand book about all the Universal Laws that I have found. Universal laws exist that affect us every day.

The Law of Attraction is "We attract to our lives, what we focus on". Thinking about what you feel grateful for, actually attracts more things to be grateful for in your life. Take a moment several times a day to notice something to be grateful for in your life and the world. Use the driving time, waiting in line at the grocery, any time when you can catch a moment, and time at the end of the day. Do it out loud, with your children in the car and have them do it, do it at the dinner table, and always do it at the end of the day and before you go to sleep. You want to incorporate this practice into your daily routine from now on. You will become more adept at noticing things throughout your day as your mind makes this a new habit.

Connection of Our Body,


and the Universe

Everything we need to know about healing the body comes from nature, mathematics, and physics. The body is a hologram. Everything in the eye represents everything in the body (Iridology). Every system and organ of the body is connected to the colon by corresponding points. Everything in the palm of our hand represents our life. And everything in the bottom of our foot represents everything in our body (reflexology). The mathematical calculations of astronomy give us information about our birth. Numerology gives us information about our birth and our name. We just have not figured out how to put it all together.

Additional information and wisdom, I want to impart to my grandnieces and grandnephews and children, adolescents, and adults in the world.


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